The Donald’s SOTU Channels “Doonesbury”

Following, in chronological order, are verbatim excerpts from this transcript of President Trump’s state of the Union speech tonight, February 24, 2026:

* * *
Our country is winning again. In fact, we're winning so much that we really don't know what to do about it. People are asking me, please, please, please, Mr. President, we're winning too much. We can't take it anymore.

We're not used to winning in our country. Until you came along, we were just always losing, but now we're winning too much. And I say no, no, no, you're going to win again. You're going to win big; you're going to win bigger than ever.

* * *
Everything was working well. Countries that were ripping us off for decades are now paying us hundreds of billions of dollars. They were ripping us so badly, you all know that. Everybody knows it, even the Democrats know it, they just don't want to say it. And yet these countries are now happy and so are we. We made deals, the deals are all done and they're happy.

They're not making money like they used to but we're making a lot of money. There was no inflation, tremendous growth. And the big story was how Donald Trump called the economy correctly and 22 Nobel Prize winners in economics didn't, they got it totally wrong. They got it really wrong. And then just four days ago, an unfortunate ruling from the United States Supreme Court, it just came down.

It came down, very unfortunate ruling. But the good news is that almost all countries and corporations want to keep the deal that they already made. Right, Scott? Knowing that the legal power that I as president have to make a new deal could be far worse for them. And therefore, they will continue to work along the same successful path that we had negotiated before the Supreme Court's unfortunate involvement.

* * *
Moving forward, factories, jobs, investment and trillions and trillions of dollars will continue pouring into the United States of America because we finally have a president who puts America first. I put America first. I love America. For decades, before I came along, we had the exact opposite. From trade to health care, from energy to immigration, everything was stolen and rigged in order to drain the wealth out of the productive hardworking people who make our country great, who make our country run.

Under Biden and his corrupt partners in Congress and beyond, it reached a breaking point with the Green New Scam, open borders for everyone. They poured in by the millions and millions from prisons, from mental institutions. They were murderers, 11,888 murderers. They came into our country; you allowed that to happen.

And record-setting inflation that cost the typical family $34,000 in just a speck of time. Now the same people in this chamber who voted for those disasters suddenly used the word affordability, a word -- they just used it. Somebody gave it to them, knowing full well that they caused and created the increased prices that all of our citizens had to endure.

You caused that problem; you caused that problem. They knew their statements were a lie. They knew it. They knew their statements were a dirty, rotten, lie. Their policies created the high prices. Our policies are rapidly ending them. We are doing really well. Those prices are plummeting downward. The price of eggs is down 60 percent.

* * *
Nobody can believe when they see the kind of numbers and especially energy, when they see energy going down to numbers like that. They cannot believe it. It's like another big tax cut. I'm also confronting one of the biggest rip-offs of our times, the crushing cost of health care, caused by you, since the passage of the Affordable Care Act, sometimes referred to as Obamacare.

Big insurance companies got rich. It was meant for the insurance companies, not for the people. With our government giving them hundreds and hundreds of billions of dollars a year as their stock prices soared 1,000, 1,200, 1,400 and even 1,700 percent, like nothing else. That's why I introduced the great health care plan.

I want to stop all payments to big insurance companies and instead, give that money directly to the people so they can buy their own health care, which will be better health care at a much lower cost. In addition, my plan requires maximum price transparency. That's a big deal. Sounds so simple, so big. And I did that in my first term and the Democrats immediately terminated it with full knowledge that they were doing a very bad thing for the people.

Costs we're going to go way up and that's what happened. And now I'm bringing them way down on health care and everything else. I'm also ending the wildly inflated cost of prescription drugs like has never happened before. Other presidents tried to do it, but they never could. They tried. Most didn't try, actually, but they tried.

They said they tried. They couldn't do it. They didn't even come close. They were all talk and no action, but I got it done. Under my just enacted Most Favored Nation agreements, Americans who have for decades paid by far the highest prices of any nation anywhere in the world for prescription drugs will now pay the lowest price anywhere in the world for drugs, anywhere, the lowest price.

[End of SOTU excerpts]

“Doonesbury” Comic Strip, from sometime in the 1980s, which made me roll on the floor with laughter (from my memory):

Mike: “How was your summer vacation?”

Zonker: “Groovy! Far Out! Out of sight! I just got off on the whole trip.”

Mike: “Could you be a little more specific?”

Amendment 25, anyone?